Funny Sms Jokes

'Enjoy our section of funny sms jokes to be shared with your friends and relatives'

Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Tommy: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

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Friend1: Do you my son has completed lots of his consignments in train..
Friend2: Than he must had kept track!

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Miser: My wife is very extravagant.. Always she demands for 1000$, 2ooo$..
Friend: But do you know what she does with that money?
Miser: I don't know, i never gave her..

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(Papa means Dad)
Johny Johny - Yes papa
Job in IT? - Yes Papa
Lost of tensions - Yes papa
Too much work - Yes papa
Social Life - No Papa
BP and Sugar - High Papa
Yearly Bonus - Joke papa
Annual Pay - Low Papa
Personal life - lost papa
Promotions and incentive - Ha Ha Ha

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Call menu of marriage beuro..
Press 1 for slim girl, press 2 for average girl, press 3 for healthy girl..
Man asked: What to press for second marriage?
Executive: Press neck of first one!
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What do you call a rope wounded around two trees of people?
Nokia connecting people..
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Miser man dies and goes to Heaven.
As a gift for his good works, God gives him two big palaces.
He sells one, rents the other and goes to live with his relatives in hell.
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Once brain walks into bar and says "can i have a pint of beer please..?"
The barman looks at him and replies "Sorry i can not serve you"
"Why not?" asks the brain
"Because you are already out of your head..."
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Girl: Mom, i am in love with a guy..
Mom shocked: How old is the boy & what is he doing.
Girl: 3 month kicking happily in my stomach..
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Man: How do short people like to travel?
Woman: In Min-Vans..
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Why did the frog say meow?
Because he was learning a foreign language..
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Once a short man asked: What is the difference between watch and wife?
Short friend replied: If a watch gets angry, it stops but if wife gets angry, she starts..
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Father's friend: It is too late, you should sleep here at my short baby's room.
Boy thought that baby will disturb him at night so he replied: OK, but i will sleep at another room.
At morning he saw a beautiful girl next to her on breakfast table.
She said: i am baby and who are you?
Boy: I am the biggest fool!!
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Father: Tell me, what do you do, when nothing goes right?
Son: It is very short and simple dad, i go LEFT!
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Daughter: Do you know that where we find a sea without water and earth with out people?
Mom: No, Pl share..
Daughter: Very simple, It is on the map.
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Boy: Mother, my school mates tease me and call me a girl..
Mother: Don't take any tension, Now when somebody calls you girl, slap them with your bag and scratch the face!!