First friend: Do you know, How to differentiate an old person from a young person?
Second friends: Very easy ! An old person can sing and brush their teeth simultaneously..
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Employee: Boss, I can not believe on my wife. She goes to bar daily and do whatever she wants to do. She do not talk to me. What should i d?
Boss: Do not worry, take it easy, keep patience, calm down.. Now tell, what is the address, where she goes daily??
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Teacher: How old your dad is?
Student : Miss, as old as me..
Teacher : How is that possible?
Kids: Simply because he became a dad only when I was born..
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Customer: Can you give me a towel?
Waiter: Yes, but please wait someone else is using it.
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John: Why can't you play jokes on snakes?
Dacy: Simply, because you can't pull their legs..
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Michal: Do yo know why women can't drive?
Lucy: Because there no road between the kitchen and the bedroom!
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Britney: What is the example of positive thinking of short people?
Jazz: I am not short, i am fun sized...
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Teacher: What is the plural of mouse?
Student: Mice
Teacher: What is the plural of baby?
Student: Twins..
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Jazz: My wife got me to believe in region..
Mack: Very funny.. How come?
Jazz: I experienced hell after marriage..
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Professor: Why you were missing from last 2 days?
Student: I only have one short uniform and that was washed day before yesterday
Professor: And what about yesterday?
Student: I was passing through your home and found your dress drying so i returned back !!
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Teacher: You scored zero marks on 500 words article..
Student: But i did well..
Teacher: You painted a picture..
Funny student: But that painting is worth 50 words..
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Funny Rats Chat..
Rat1: I am so brave that i caught in rat trap and bit it very easily..
Rat2: Not done, me digested the whole bottle of rat poison and enjoyed..
Rat3: Bye, it is my time to go home to irritate the cat...
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Dad: Which is better the moon or the sun?
Son: The Moon, because it gives us light at night when we really need it and sun gives light in day the time time when we do not really need it!
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Girls always think about marrying a man expecting that he will change, but he doesn't..
Boys often think to marrying a woman expecting that she will never change and she does !!
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Son: Girls do not understand me.
Mom: Why?
Son: Because they think that I have lots more issues than Life magazine. !!
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"The secret of humor is surprise." ~Aristotle