Do you know that why are the Lions like a tampon?
Yes, they are only good for one period and have no second string.
Do you know ion's favorite food?
Baked beings !
Why are lions so religious?
Because they prey frequently, and prey as a family!
I surprise why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
Because he was trying to make both ends meet!
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?
A collie-flower
Who is the dogs favorite comedian?
Growlcho Marx!
What is the dogs favorite city?
New Yorkie!
Why are dogs such bad dancers?
They have two left feet.
Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
Because you can't bury them in trees!
What is cleverer than a talking cat?
A spelling bee!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a bottle of vinegar?
A sourpuss!
How can if you have a mad dog?
It chases parked cars!
Once a female was going in the park when she sees a man playing chess with his cat. She said:: I can not believe on this, a cat plays chess, wow ! what a clever cat! Man answered: No No The cat is not that clever, you know I m beating it 5 games to 1?
Where do cats write down notes?
Scratch Paper!
What do you call a cat Who’s joined the Red Cross?
A first-aid kit!
What’s a cat’s favorite food?
It is Petatoes!
What do you call it when a cat stops?
A paws!
How do you know if you cat's got a bad cold?
He has cat-arrh!
Where did the kittens go on their class trip?
To a mewseum.
What’s every cat’s favorite song?
Three Blind Mice!
What kind of work does a weak cat do?
Light mouse work.
What is the name of that key which does not open any door?
Of-course a monkey
Do you know that what do monkeys do for fun and entertainment?
They share jokes about people
What will you call a Monkey in a garden?
Plant Manager
Which side of a monkey has lots of hair?
It is outside.
If ten monkeys run after one banana, what time is it?
Ten after one
How do monkeys get down the stairs?
They slide down the banana-steer.
What a banana says to the monkey?
Bananas don't really speak..
How do you know if there is a Brachiosaurus in bed with you?
By the dinosaurs.
