... Hilarious Jokes New Short & Funny Jokes - The Laugh Starter: Hilarious

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Passenger was complaining to the railway officer:-
I got late, why do you make time table when all the trains always get late?
Officer replied: We make it otherwise how would you know that trains are late!

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Dad: What you become when you grow up?
Son: Doctor because i have the handwriting for that..

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There are three wishes of every man..
to be as handsome as his mother thinks to be as rich as his child believes to have as many women as his wife suspects...

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Funny customer asked to the shopkeeper, “What do you have for graying hair?”
The Shopkeeper replied, “Nothing but the highest respect Sir.”!!!

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A student, who is studying English as a foreign language,
was confused when he saw the words "open here" on a box of
laundry soap, so he asks the clerk, "Can't I wait until
I get home to open it?"

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Man's bad day......
opened the door, it's broken,
open the tap , it's broken,
open the suitcase, it's broken,,
now fearing of doing looooo..

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Sister: why you keep newspaper in fridge?
Brother: Because it is full of hot news!!!

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Dad: Never argue with an idiot.
Son; Why?
Dad: He will drag you down to their level and then beat you with his experience.
Son: Who is mad?
Father: Mad is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange way that another person who is listening can't understand him. Do you understand me?
Son: No.

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Harry: Jenny, what is your age?
Jenny: Why?
Harry: Scientist are trying to figure out how long a person can live without brain. So i want to give the solution by telling your age.

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Boss: Tell Imagine, you are in locked in room, how can yourself if it caught fire?
Officer: Very simple, Stop imagining...

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Patient: In my dreams rats play cricket every night.
Doctor: take this tablet, you will be fine.
Patient: Can i take medicine tomorrow?
Doctor: Why?
Patient: Today is their final match.

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Patient: I get heartburn when i eat birthday cake.
Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.

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Dad: : What do the kid of vampire says to her mother at night?
Son: Turn off the switch, i am afraid of light!!

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Man to his friend: Do you one thing?
Short man: What?
Man: You are so short that you are the last person to know that its raining..

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Boy: What is meant by serial killer?
Girl: The man who adds poison in someone's cereal..

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"Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way you deal with it is what makes the difference."
Virginia Satir